How To Talk Yourself Into Success

 In Blog

The most important conversation you’ll have today is the one you have with yourself. Negative self-talk, also referred to as your inner critic, is not only a buzz kill it’s a momentum changer. It can quickly fuel momentum in the wrong direction and make things go from bad to worse in your show and in your life.

We all talk to ourselves. Writers and performers have long struggled with their inner critic that either impedes or blocks their creative output. Our inner dialogue has an enormous effect on our success in life according to psychologist Ethan Kross in a recent Psychology Today cover story.

To make self-talk work for you, lose the pronouns! Kross conducted a series of groundbreaking experiments on the human brain and concludes that using pronouns like I or you will actually cause you to perform worse in stressful situations, even if that self-talk is positive.
Stop using I or you when you address yourself. Instead, talk to yourself by name and you are likely to ace your performance.

Kross points out that referring to yourself in third person shifts the focus away from you as if you are giving advice to another person. When you call yourself by name, it actually flips a switch in the cerebral cortex of your brain that gives you confidence.

An example of this is when LeBron James made the decision to leave Cleveland for Miami he said, “LeBron James has to do what’s best for LeBron James.” He went on to win two NBA titles in Miami.

“Flip switch” is the method used in the Artist Way program to silence the inner critic. When you notice yourself and/or your show getting off track and the momentum is going south, check your self-talk.

Talk about your performance in a positive way in third person. Flip the switch. Kill the critic. Watch your success rate soar.


Hand-picked just for you from the Randy Lane Company Vault

  • Reuniting With a Long-Lost Dad. Jeff and Jer hired a private investigator and created memorable, emotional on-air moments at KYXY San Diego.
  • The Daddy-Daughter Game. How well does dad know his daughter, and how well does daughter know dad?
  • The Single Dad Dating Game. Play matchmaker with eligible fathers and get the kids involved in the selection process.
  • Don’t Tell Dad. Story topic on the biggest secret that a mother, daughter, son or family kept from the father, and what happened if it was ever revealed.
  • Competing With Step-Dad. What did you do to one-up your kid’s stepdad or your step-child’s father? Adapted from a Mother’s Day topic from the KVJ Show.

RLC clients can access these turn-key instructions on how to execute killer content about dads with your user name and password.


Why are people unfaithful? Human behavior on the outer edges of societal acceptability makes for fascinating content, and it’s an area that Dave Ryan specializes in at KDWB Minneapolis.

Their weekly benchmark feature is one person’s story about how the discovered their significant other cheating, what was said and done leading up to the moment of discovery, what happened since and what relationship lessons were learned that the audience might benefit from, with an example of the segment in this clip.

Dave says that guys share stories about their cheating women, but 90% of the time it’s women telling stories about men.

SETUP: Solicit listener infidelity stories, framing it as an opportunity to share a negative experience so that others can learn from what went wrong. For added drama – and a second segment on the topic for longer TSL – get the other party on the air and tell their side too.


Your radio or TV show probably airs the standard recorded, produced IDs with professional voice-over. Mark In The Morning (Mark Thompson of “Mark and Brian” fame) at The Sound in Los Angeles found a more memorable way of branding his show, and got great on-air content and local press coverage to go with it.

Mark offered local high school glee clubs an opportunity to win their way onstage to sing backup for Foreigner onstage at their upcoming concert if they created a jingle for the Mark In The Morning Show. The results were outstanding as you can see in this video of the two finalists – which at this writing had over 19,000 views.

The Sound also received great local press coverage like this.


“Are there weird things in your daily routine that must be a certain way or they cause you anxiety?”

Shoboy and Nina posed that question last week on AMP Radio, and New York City listeners responded with an avalanche of obsessive-compulsive stories, including:

  • A retail clerk who must put all the dollar bills in numerical sequential order when balancing the cash register at closing.
  • A delivery driver who must have the AC vents perfectly centered and in-line, despite the fact that she would feel cooler if she would turn the vents toward her.
  • Shoboy, who is obsessed with textures and shared a hilarious story about the time he went to extreme lengths to touch the jacket of a stranger in a restaurant.

SETUP: Stories of superstitions, obsessions and compulsions can make for fun on-air content. An alternate setup is to discuss extreme sports-related compulsions that super-fans must observe to bring their favorite team luck during the NBA or NHL finals.


By Laura Nickerson, The Randy Lane Company

What Surprise Did You Learn About Your Ex on Social Media?
Facebook-stalking is fun for everyone! But there are sometimes shocks and unexpected information to be had when creeping your former squeeze on Instagram, etc. What were they doing that surprised you?

I Knew They Were Lying To Me When________.
What do your kids, spouse or co-workers do that is a dead giveaway that they are lying? Share stories of times you have busted someone close to you by catching their “tell.”

What Did Your Dad Teach You By Example?
For Father’s Day, share stories about lessons learned from fathers – good and bad – where their actions spoke louder than words.


We hope to see you August 6-7 as Randy moderates a panel on “Taking Your Show From Ordinary To Extraordinary.” We can’t reveal who is on the panel yet – but when you hear the talented names involved, you’ll say “wow.”

Jeff is a presenting a seminar on talent endorsements called “Live Reads = Big Stupid Money.” Jeff would love to play a clip of one of your live commercials at the convention if you have one that you are especially proud of. Contact

Register for Morning Show Boot Camp here.


Have you ever thought, “I want to exercise more, I just need to find the motivation.” Experts will tell you that you could be waiting forever, and that relying on motivation alone is a path leading nowhere.

Instead, take small actions that get you on the steps towards where you want to be. There’s a great article on “How to Motivate Yourself” on the I Will Teach You To Be Rich blog by Ramit Sethi in this link.

Tips include:

  • Plan for failure. An example is the guy who wanted to drink more tea instead of unhealthy sodas, so he placed the kettle and tea right in his way so it was effortless to choose tea over something else when he walked into the kitchen.
  • Put it on your calendar. You show up to work at your job at a set time every day. Do the same thing for yourself. If it is not on your calendar, it won’t happen.
  • Develop laser-guided focus. Pick your number one goal, write it down (using pen and paper matters) and commit to one action towards that goal.

The old saying is “act as if.” If you act as if you are motivated, then you will be so. The blog also includes instructive videos from social psychologists and productivity experts on catapulting your hopes, plans and dreams into reality.

websiteoftheweekWEBSITE OF THE WEEK


If you have a prep service that gives you great pop culture audio clips every day for your show, lucky you. But what if you don’t have that service?

Whip Clip is a smart phone app, but it’s also a website that puts many (but not all) of the best late-night TV moments, music performances, news and episode highlights right at your fingertips.(Thanks to AJ at KEGY in San Diego for the suggestion!)

videooftheweek2VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Justin Scheman, producer on the Matthew Blades Show on Mix 96.9 Phoenix told his girlfriend Diana that they had been selected to participate in their favorite TV show, “The Amazing Race.”

Cameras were on Justin and Diana as they followed clues from Philadelphia to New York to Iceland – where Justin revealed that the whole Amazing Race thing was a ruse to get Diana under the incredible Northern lights so he could ask her to marry him.

The story has gone viral, and in this clip Justin and Diana got another big surprise during their appearance on the Rachel Ray show.



Now you can turn any messages into a meme while you are standing in line at the grocery. The world needs more clever cat quotes!

quoteoftheweekQUOTE OF THE WEEK

“Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles. We’ve all worked with that person. That person is a drag.” – Tina Fey



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